Monsters of Montrose




By Jeff

That was, well, fitting. Photos are trickling in as I find them (thanks to Velogrrl, ewwhite).

Avi was the first from the Cuttin' Crew on the course. He was rocking some bright green socks and a highly aggressive style that landed him an 8th place finish in the early morning masters. The cruiser set up camp at a nasty post-climb hairpin turn into an icy descent which lead to a 90 degree turn through a paved tunnel. It provided plenty of amusing moments as well as good photo ops.

stumpjamer1.jpgThe grill was busted out, the portable stoves were turned on, the cider was heated up then spiked and slowly people were congregating around and inside the bus. The weather was sub freezing but the atmosphere was warm and pleasant. Adam and Al ripped through the 3's to an unknown result and unknown result, respectively. Jamie was doing well in the women's race when her seat-clamp busted. A friendly stranger (Z-man!) hopped up with a random 26.8 seat post (with saddle) and we pulled the quick switch-a-roo. Almost too friendly... Naw, that's just cyclocross.

Around this time, Adam had his recovery hot dog and beer and we set out for a practice lap on the performance enhanced cruiser tandem. I was steerer and Adam was my stoker (who knows how many times we've been in THAT situation). We got the commands and the dismounts down cherry and as we rolled around the course we brought out the smiles and sweet, sweet hecklers. People were really feelin' it so we set ourselves up for the 4b's.

Following the pro's race, I was greeted by a joyful crowd of Half Acre people with the Awesomeness Award. An honor bestowed upon this team with the big bus and the asshole spectators it came to bear. A seriously flattering compliment and beautiful trophy to boot. Thanks so much guys!

The 4a's provided another lovely treat for the day. Max needed a finish of 22nd or better or something and he was guaranteed victory for the entire series. We blew it on the champagne hand-up and he had some technical difficulties but few cares as he cruised to a top ten finish. Big ups to Mr. Riordan for conquering the Chicago Cyclocross Cup.

aviness.jpgFrom there things just got amusingly silly. Avi wore just a Michael Jordan jersey for his top layer. It was 10 degrees sans windchill. He is awesome. Ben rolled strong like bull even though he admitted to feeling sub-par all race.

Bradley had an exciting start only to have serious problems on a fall that twisted him like a pretzel. He couldn't move his ankle real well after that and Daryl drove him to the hospital to discover he broke his fibula. I shit you not, he was super excited to have crutches and for some reason wants to design a cast with a cleat so he can clip in and bike some more. Whatever the case may be, I admire his optimism and enthusiasm.

In the 4b's, Dr. Morell got out and at it with a tenacity only matched by the course officials as they chased down the dynamic duo on the tandem. Despite hanging back so as not to interfere with everyone else's ride, it took the main official half a lap to cut us off and pull us for riding an illegal bike. We must have handled the technical aspects surprisingly well. It was still amusing however since Adam couldn't see past me. Even upon disqualification, he just kept pedaling. Finally I got him to stop pedaling by sharing the news and we respectfully bowed out. I'm not gonna lie, it's a complete bummer but make no mistake I understand and will adhere to the rule. I just want all 3 of my readers to know: me and Adam ripped it. Thankfully Mike was doing a helluva slip-n-slide for us DQ's to enjoy from the sidelines.

In summation: This is a great sport. This is a great atmosphere. This is a great and well-earned success for Max. It's a great attitude, Bradley. It's a GREAT trophy. It's been a great year. Thanks to everyone. Good luck Adam and Al at Nationals. Group hug and for the love of GOD, someone get Gatto a hammy.

maxxie saxxie