10. When waking up at 4 am to get to a race, it always helps to have entertainment. In this case, Adam, in his full track kit, in a gas station deep in hunting country, doesn’t disappoint. I’m pretty sure I overheard “Git R Done” somewhere.
9. His words of messengerly advice: “Don’t zone out on the hot chicks when you’re filing at state court…just focus on the Snickers bar and get in the right line.”
8. His anecdotal history of Madison, in this case involving a 30 pack and a friend from Chicago who got lucky in Adam’s bathtub. Unfortunately the squeek-squoork sound effects don’t translate well to the written word, but use your imagination.
7. Another Madison incident that he insists was not a hallucination: it involved him ollie-ing a live squirrel that tried to cross the sidewalk in front of him, and ended with his board getting flattened by a car. He escaped unscathed, as did the squirrel.
6. His new state motto: “I’ll let you see my Johnson in Wisconsin.” Best when sung.
5. He was “That Guy Racing With A Beard.”
4. His pre-race game plan was “to act like I’m drunk. What’s up duuude?”
3. He didn’t train much this spring. He hasn’t raced this season.
2. Instead he rode 1,007 miles around Lake Michigan in 13 days. Then he took a single rest day, and…
1. Grabbed 7th place in the Race of the Future! With 4,400 feet of climbing, half the field abandoned in both the 3s and 4/5s, and most Chicagoland riders staring in awe at that stuff called elevation, Adam just Got R Done.
In other news, Al “I’m not much of a climber” got 6th in the 3s, then came home and rode to Northbrook, but we all know he’s made some sort of zombie deal with the devil. Elsewhere in the 4/5s, Avi slogged to 15th place, while Mike mashed for 19th, despite being stuck with a 23 in back. At least when you bring Adam along, you’re guaranteed to have a great time.